Our soft hearts

"Acting out and repressing are the main ways that we shield our hearts, the main ways that we never connect with our vulnerability, our compassion, our sense of the open, fresh dimension of our being.   By acting out or repressing we invite suffering, bewilderment, or confusion to intensify.   Instead of acting out or repressing-use the situation as an opportunity to touch that soft spot.  Underneath all that craving or aversion or jealousy or feeling wretched about yourself, underneath the hopelessness and despair and depression, there's something extremely soft.   Feel the wounded heart that is underneath the addiction, self-loathing or anger.  If someone comes along and shoots an arrow in your heart, it's fruitless to stand there and yell at the person.  It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there's an arrow in your heart."  Pema Chondron