"Often, confusion is the tension of trying to make sense of things too soon, before enough of the inner players have learned their parts.  Often, experience is the way that the heart and mind and spirit practice what they need to play."  Mark Nepo

Institutions

"What happens when our institutions no longer serve us, no longer reflect the truth of our own experience? We sit on pews and feel a soul-stirring disconnect as we are preached sermons spoken from the dead. What we know is not what we hear. We mistake our confusion for guilt. Our hearts close. Our minds wander and we walk away. Inspiration returns when another voice is heard, one that recognizes that the past and the future are contemporary. How can we learn to speak in a language that is authentic,faithful to our hearts? The ceiling is raised by our imagination. Authentic acts reform.

-Terry Tempest Williams.
"Leap"

Feeling

"Feeling is life and death at the same time."  Hazrat Inayat Khan

Healing

The cloud does not insist upon it's form,
The wave does not force it's way over the ocean,
So why should you clutch so tightly your little map?

Follow your heart
And know joy in all things.
The path of freedom
has no markers,
Yet leads to fulfillment;
The path of confusion
Is crowded with signs,
Pointing in different directions.

The Great Way is a humble, solitary path
Leading home;
Follow it closely and be guided.
How do you know you are on the Way?

When your map no longer serves you.

Havin Travino, "The Tao of Healing"

Gift Me

 GIFT ME

Gift me with your presence
Show up fully, but only when you really want to
Not out of obligation or fear of disappointing.

Gift me with your stories
Of joy and pain, for through them you grow
To love life and learn wisdom
And in hearing them from you, I deepen too.
Tell it all, every detail...
What was said, felt and discovered
And how it changed you

Gift me with honesty
Tell me when I hurt or disappoint you
When I make you proud or just that you love me.
Tell me the truth, as you see it,
In me, the world and life
As the unfolding Mystery


Gift me with forgiveness
An honest attempt to give
Not only me, but all you meet
The benefit of the doubt
That even in my faults and frailties
You see the inherent worth and Light of God
Most of all...

Gift me with a chosen silence
When it would be easier to judge
Or you feel you can't resist the urge
To share with another the latest amusing, confusing
Insane thing you saw me do...or refrain from
For time has a way, of bringing all things full circle

Gift me with a compassionate, listening ear
When I seek a witness to my life and experience
And open your heart even wider,
That it may take it ALL in
And love me even more when I most confuse you

Gift me with a place at your table
A phone call just because
An invitation to adventure
And the assurance that
Not a day goes by without a smile lifting your lips
In fondness for memories we have yet to create

Gift me with patience
As time slows my steps
And mind's edges dull
Allow me the dignity and freedom of which I am capable,
But if the time comes that I am not safe or sane enough,
Care for me, as I tried to do for you
when you still fit in my arms
And needed a shoulder to sleep on.

Valerie Wilkins Alder  

Shadow Wisdom

a"Our wisdom is all mixed up with what we call neurosis.  Our brilliance, our juiciness, our spiciness, is all mixed up with our craziness and confusion and therefore it doesn't do any good to try to get rid of our so-called negative aspects, because in the process we also get rid of our basic wonderfulness.   We can lead our lives so as to become more awake to who we are and what we're doing, to become more alert, more inquisitive, and curious about ourselves."  Pema Chondron

Opening

"The only reason we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with.   To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes."  Pema Chondron

William James says there are two types of people:  Once-born and Twice-born. 

Once-Born:

1. Do not stray from familiar territory of who they think they are and what they think is expected of them.
2. If pushed to the edge (of Dante's dark woods) where the straight way is lost.
3. Don't want to learn something new from life's darkest lessons.
4. Stay with what feels safe and what is expected/acceptable to their family and society
5. Stick to what they already know -even if they don't necessarily want it or like it.
6. May go their whole life and never know what lies beyond the woods.
7. May question later, "Is this all there is to life?"
8. Lives as if the soul was a figment of a flighty imagination.
9. Leads to confusion, numbness, sadness, depression, anger.
10. Avoid, deny or bitterly accept the unpredictable changes of real life.

Twice-Born:

1. Always pays attention to the soul poking it's head through a half-lived life.
2. Whether through choice or calamity- goes into the woods, loses the straight way, confronts that which needs to change within himself in order to live a more genuine and radiant life.
3. The journey into the woods of change and transformation is an inner one. 
4. The most ordinary-looking lives are often being lived by the most extraordinary spiritual warriors; people who have chosen the road less traveled, of self-reflection.
5. Uses adversity for awakening.
6. Trade the safety of the known for the power of the unknown
7. Something calls them into the woods (betrayal, illness, divorce, loss, death), where the straight path vanishes, and there is no turning back, only going through.