Transformation and Change

"We create patterns that others depend on, and then the last thing we ever imagined happens; we grow and change, then then to stay vital we must break the patterns we created. There is no blame or fault in this. It is commonplace in nature. Watch the ocean and the shore do their dance of buildup and crumble and you'll see this happens daily.

We know we are close to this threshold when we hear someone say, "You're not yourself," or "That was out of character for you." What is difficult at this juncture is to resist either complying with how others see us or withholding who we really are.

The challenge, which I don't do well but stay committed to, is to say to those we love, "I am more than I have shown you and more than you are willing to see. Let's work our love and know each other more fully." Mark Nepo

Integrity

"Cowardice asks the question, ‘Is it safe?’ Expediency asks the question, ‘Is it
politic?’ But conscience asks the question, ‘Is it right?’ And there
comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor
politic, nor popular but because conscience tells one it is right." —
...Martin Luther King, Jr.

Integrity

"There's no sense in talking about being true to yourself until you are sure what voice you are being true to.  It takes hard work to differentiate the voices of the unconscious."  Marion Woodman

Individuality

"To know what you prefer instead of humbly saying 'amen' to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive."  Robert Louis Stevenson

Listening

"There is a way of relating to others such that one deliberately listens for the hidden beauty in them.   The place of their beauty is often the place of their greatest integrity.  When you listen, the integrity and wholeness in others moves closer.  Your attention strengthens it and makes it easier for them to hear it for themselves.  In your presence, they can more easily inhabit that in them which is beyond their limitations, a place of greater freedom and sanctuary.  Eventually they may be able to live there."  Rachel Naomi Remen

Recognition

"We are often fooled by someone's appearance, their age or illness or anger, or meanness or just too busy to recognize that there is in everyone a place of goodness and integrity, no matter how deeply buried.   We are too hurried or distracted to stop and bear witness to it.   When we recognize the spark of God in others, we blow on it, no matter how deeply it has been buried or for how long.   When we bless someone, we touch the unborn goodness in them and wish it well."  Rachel Naomi Remen

Change

"Even after many years of seeing, thinking, and living one way, we are able to reach past all that to claim our integrity and live in a way we may never have expected to live."  Rachel Naomi Remen

Approval

"Some people spend enormous amounts of time considering the impression that their words and behaviors create, playing always for approval.   A great deal of energy goes into this process of fixing and editing ourselves.   We have changed ourselves into someone that the people who matter to us can love.   Sometimes no longer know what is true for us, in which direction our integrity lies."  Rachel Naomi Remen

Integrity

"Integrity does not mean a moral judgment.  It simply means to live from the place in you that has the greatest truth."  Rachel Naomi Remen